Fish

Fish

 

                                                                                                                                        Theresa Bramwell

Amanda: Wampin’

Carry: Nuttin’, mi a go check Devon down a road. You a come? (nothing im going to go visit Devon down the street, do you want to come?)

Amanda: Nah, mi nah wah guh round battymon business. ( no, I don’t want to be around gay people)

Carry:  ( laughs as she shakes her head)

Devon: Baby you can’t do that ( Giggles ), that does not match.

Jerome: Really, girl I look cute ( devious smile as he looks in the mirror ).

Devon: tell me where at! ( laughs ).

Doorbell rings

Devon: (opens door) Hey girl, what’s up! ( gives Carry a hug ).

Carry: ( smiles) Hey sexy, what’s happening? Is Jerome here?

Devon: ( closes door) yea he in the bedroom getting dressed ( hand waves, lots of hand movements), he doesn’t match but he swear he look good so imam leave him be, cause I love  him ( laughs, walks to living room, Carry follows)

Ring Ring

Amanda: Ello? ( Hello)

Dexter: Yea, wah ya a do? ( yeah, what are you doing?)

Amanda: mi deh ome a watch likkle TV and a nyam mi lunch, u? ( I’m home, watching TV, and eating my lunch, you?)

Dexter: o, Where carry deh, eim nah dey ome? ( Oh, where is Carry, She’s not home?)

Amanda: ( Giggles) Nah, eim dey by di battymon down a road. ( No, she’s by they gay boy down the street.)

Dexter: A wah di bloodclot eim a do down a battymon yard? Battymon fin dead! ( what the fuck is she doing by a gay man’s house? Gay men need to die!)

Amanda: ( LAUGHS OUT LOUD, LOL)

Dexter: Laff ya a laff, my girl a ang out wit battymon and ya a laff? Dat dey nah right! Mon nah fi dey wit mon, God mek Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve. Yo, mi nah undastand ow a mon can lay inna bed wit anoda mon, buddy a fi pum pum not batty! Eim nah ear da people dem a talk seh fish business nah right?! Yo, cha mon, mi MOD nah bloodclot now!!!

( you’re laughing, she’s hanging out with a gay man and you’re laughing? That’s not right! Man is not suppose to be with man, God made Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve. Yo, I don’t understand how a man can lay in bed with another man, penis is for Vagina not rectum! She doesn’t hear the people talking about how being gay is not right?! Yo, ( suck of the teeth ), I’m fucking mad now.)

Amanda: Eim nah undastand dat, eim listen to Kartel every ratid day and nah undastand. “Nah mon pon di Gaza nah bore tongue!” ( she doesn’t understand that, she’s listens to Vybez Kartel every fucking day and still doesn’t understand, “ No man in Gaza pierces his tongue”.)

Dexter: mi a go mek arrr undastand! ( I’m going to make her understand!)

Amanda: Wah ya a gah do? ( what are you going to do?)

Dexter: mi a go battymon yard and mek arr undastand.

Jerome: how do I look? ( he walks his runway walk and twirls)

Carry: you look stunning Romi! I Love the boots! ( smiling and in total aww)

Jerome: really girl? Dev doesn’t think I match. ( hand waves)

Devon: ( giggles)

Carry: You look…( the door bell rings )

Devon: I’ll get it, it’s probably that pizza we ordered, or the stripper. ( giggles and runs for the door). ( opens door ) um and you are…?

Dexter: Move ya bloodclot! ( pushes door open wider and Devon out of the way ) ( Move out of my fucking way!)

Carry and Jerome: turns in their direction. Carry is startled when she see its Dexter.

Carry: What are you doing? Ow ya mi dey ya? ( how you knew I was here )

Dexter: dat nah matta, da question is wah ya a do inna battymon yard? ( that doesn’t matter, the question is what are you doing in a gay man’s house)

Jerome: excuse me that language is not to be used in my home. ( hand waves as he stands his graound)

Dexter: ( walks over to Jerome ) wah ya seh battymon!? Mi nah ear wah ya seh. ( what did you say gay man!? I didn’t hear what you said.)

Carry: stop Dexta! Dis nah necessary star. Their cool, they don’t mean no harm. ( stop Dexter! This isn’t necessary.)

Dexter: (turns to carry) STOP?! Wah ya a talk seh? ( walks over to Carry in a scary way ) Mi nah undastand ow you can tan ya and allow fish business to tek ova. Fi you poopa know you dey ya? ( What are you saying? I don’t understand how you can stand here and allow gay life to just carry on. Does your father know you’re here?)

Carry: ( faces the ground ) silence

Dexter: ( laughs) eim would murder ya boxside in ya if eim did know ya dey in ya! ( turns to Devon and then to Jerome) she’s a Jamaican at art. Eim nah gree wit dem dey sinting uno a deal wid. Eim cant tell fi arr poopa battymon fi arr friends, she dead! Uno need fi dead! Dat dey nastiness need fi stop cuz it nah right! ( grabs carry and walks towards the door ) If uno come wid dat infront a mi again a two coppa inna ya boxside you a get. ( He would murder/kill your ass if he knew you was here! She’s Jamaican at heart. She dosent agree with the things y’all are doing. She cant tell her fatherngay men are her friends, she would die! Y’all need to die ( gay men) The gay business need to stop because its not right. If I see this gay business again I will shoot two shots in your ass.)

                                                            The End